The joke fell flat, the Press Corps admitted, and would have been funnier, the same Press Corps argued, if Gibbs had not written "Left" on his "Right" hand.
The White House, pointed out that Gibbs often confuses right and left.
"Gibbs also thinks "Um" is a noun", said one insider speaking off the record," And always takes Bo's poop out the left exit of the oval office to the great lawn, which is for Ambassadors. The right exit is for trash. Ever try explaining to a pissed off Chinese diplomat why his slippers look like an oil slick".
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Sunday, February 7, 2010
More Liberal Readers Respond!
Sarah Palin is a dummy. She took 100,000 for a speech!. Why, I get three hundred thousand per speech, and I don't even believe what I am saying.
Al Gore
I am not stupid. I was let into Harvard. The Admissions committee said they were really impressed and the tuition would only be 800,000$ per semester, they would let me make a 1,000,000 $ donation to the Harvard Wolf Refuge for victims of aerial hunting, though they said they would build it "really soon". They also said it would be a good idea if I donated a urine and stool sample to the Harvard Square Woman's Health Study Clinic. I am still not sure what furniture has to do with health study.
Ashely Judd
I am not a bitch! I used to show William Safire my thong all the time. He would get real red, but at the time, he needed to know what a thong was to write about the Clinton Monica scandal. So see- I help people all the time. And no, an abridged copy of my book " Are men really necessary" is not being handed out with Trojan's new vibrator. Ok, when I was dating Micheal Douglas, I did once tape his member to his stomach, when he was sleeping, but only because he made me watch "Romancing the Stone" five times when we had sex.
Maureen Dowd- New York Times
Al Gore
I am not stupid. I was let into Harvard. The Admissions committee said they were really impressed and the tuition would only be 800,000$ per semester, they would let me make a 1,000,000 $ donation to the Harvard Wolf Refuge for victims of aerial hunting, though they said they would build it "really soon". They also said it would be a good idea if I donated a urine and stool sample to the Harvard Square Woman's Health Study Clinic. I am still not sure what furniture has to do with health study.
Ashely Judd
I am not a bitch! I used to show William Safire my thong all the time. He would get real red, but at the time, he needed to know what a thong was to write about the Clinton Monica scandal. So see- I help people all the time. And no, an abridged copy of my book " Are men really necessary" is not being handed out with Trojan's new vibrator. Ok, when I was dating Micheal Douglas, I did once tape his member to his stomach, when he was sleeping, but only because he made me watch "Romancing the Stone" five times when we had sex.
Maureen Dowd- New York Times
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Los Angeles County declines to force condom use in porn films From The Los Angeles Times
"As an artist, I need freedom to fully sychronize heart and limb, passion and flesh, towards a pulsating and erect performance, so to speak", said Manny "Gonad the Barbarian" Toppit on the set of " Coeds of Thigh High".
" As long as I get paid, he can wear a sock for all I care", added his co-star Wanda Flo Lay.
" As long as I get paid, he can wear a sock for all I care", added his co-star Wanda Flo Lay.
Brains of vegetative patients show life From the Los Angeles Times
Several were judged releasable to vote in the Illinois Democratic Primary.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Is the New York Times Bigoted? Nah!
What was in doubt was how the jury would react to the defense’s attempts to portray the killer as somehow less culpable because of his fevered opposition to abortion and his outrage that abortion rights are constitutionally protected in this country ( The New York Times on the Jury in the abortion murder trial)
Whew! The Times was aghast that on the jury there was not one vegan, or an environmentalist, or a performance artist , or anybody who attended an ivy league school or at least Syracuse. They were doubly nervous when the jury sent out for Dunkin Donuts instead of Starbucks! But the jury got it right, a midwest jury at that!
Whew! The Times was aghast that on the jury there was not one vegan, or an environmentalist, or a performance artist , or anybody who attended an ivy league school or at least Syracuse. They were doubly nervous when the jury sent out for Dunkin Donuts instead of Starbucks! But the jury got it right, a midwest jury at that!
Obama to push for jobs, small-business lending in New Hampshire From CNN
That's right. Jobs only for New Hampshire and they better not screw the White House like Nebraska.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Obama to Field Questions on YouTube From ExecutiveGov
And then First Dog Bo will play the Piano. "He doesn't really play the piano", White House Spokeswoman Chloe Y. Midia said," He just bangs on the keys with his paws. We want to be up front on that. But pet lovers- almost twenty million voting americans- will love it".
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